Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Oh the things I’ve seen. The first Clinton administration. The Nagano Olympics. Microsoft Windows 95. But I’m 41 now. Time… to die.

Ok, so I am obsessed (starring Beyonce and Ali Larter?) with the Olympics. I know people give the Winter Olympics shit for not being as good as the Summer Olympics, but you know what I have to say to that? Poo on you. I am so down with the Winter Olympics. I could watch almost any of the events all day long. My personal favorites are Alpine Skiing, which includes: Downhill, Super-Combi, Super-G and the Giant Slalom. But I also enjoy each and every skiing and snowboarding events, and also the Luge, Skeleton, Bobsled, Speed Skating and Figure Skating.

The obsession with the Olympics in general started as a child. And I have to say, one of my most proudest and exciting moments was learning to play the Olympic theme song on my recorder. And in 4th grade we got to perform it at the beginning of Field Day. It was... A magical and proud day in my life.

I really don't know what it is about Alpine Skiing, but I can watch it for hours upon hours. It's like relaxing and exciting at the same time. I am more pissed than ever that I am currently at a job where I don't have a TV on my desk (I know that sounds preposterous to most of you, but when you work in TV you often get a TV on your desk. Heaven).

I also have a borderline unhealthy obsession with Bode Miller. (I also think about Johnny Mosely almost everyday. The dinner roll was... a work of art. Poetry in motion, if you will). But I saw this special on Bode Miller once and it talked about how his resting heart rate, right before launching out of the gate downhill, is in the 180s, fueled entirely on adrenaline. Like, I don't know why I find that so sexual, but I do. Oh and he looks like this:

So that doesn't hurt. His facial hair is almost as perfect as Sam Worthington's in Avatar (calm down, I said almost). But yeah, when you're watching the Olympics for hours on end, you get fun facts like that, to post in your blog... And your dreams.

Anyway, to communicate to you all how much I loooooooove the Winter Olympics, I've decided to copy and paste the EVite I sent out to my friends this morning urging them to come watch with me (I typically cry at least once during the Opening Ceremony and it's usually when South Korea and North Korea enter the stadium holding hands. Tearing up right now, no biggie). A salute of the hand to you, NBC, for finally having content outside of Thursday nights that I will actually watch.

Now, please don't get too jealous that you weren't invited to this super high-society party. One day you might find your way into my inner circle, if you're lucky enough...

Without further ado, my Evite:

Hello friends and lovers. Well... Friends (womp womp)...

Just wanted to cordially invite you all to my apartment on Friday evening to view the opening ceremonies.

You may or may not know that I hate viewing sports on TV unless they are tennis or olympic related. So I would like to usher in, with all of you, the beginning of an absolutely amazing two weeks for me.

I know the opening ceremony itself will not be as good as Beijing, but I'll be making chicken pudding and other fun stuff, so you're all going to be just fine.

And as much as I love you all, I will not be providing alcohol. My hard earned dollars will be going towards food. So BYO B/W/L. I will also have some stuff that is green that you put into a glass contraption, light on fire, and inhale into your lungs. It's all very high tech.

HOPEFULLY MY FIOS APPOINTMENT ON THURSDAY MORNING GOES WELL SO THIS CAN ACTUALLY HAPPEN (in case you haven't heard, we lost cable again for not paying bills. whoops. FUCK you time warner. don't care).

I also reserve the right to yell at you to be quiet if i'm particularly taken in the moment. I also will have a reserved seat so that I can see the TV at all times. For more information please see http://www.nbcolympics.com/news-features/news/newsid=346602.html



It also included this picture:


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