Thursday, May 6, 2010
Pandora: Not just where the Na'vi people live
I thought we had a deal here… I thought you would play the same 20-30 songs on repeat on each station I create and I would pretend like I didn’t notice you can only find 20-30 songs with musical qualities similar to Cold War Kids (that’s the station I’ve been listening to the most lately. I highly recommend).
But no. You’ve led me on to believe we had this perfect relationship, and it’s not. You don’t want to be with me for more than 40 hours a month? How insulting. 40 hours a month? Do you know what I do all day? Nothing. Well, not nothing… But mostly nothing. And when I’m not doing nothing I’m doing something that I can listen to music while doing. And there is way more than 40 hours a month that I need your services.
40 hours is the normal amount that people work in a week, not a month. I’m just kinda sick of all of Pandora’s bullshit. They pride themselves on being commercial free… but there are still commercials. I mean, yeah, there are way way fewer commercials on Pandora than there are on normal radio. I’ll give them that. I’m not trying to take that away. But once every few songs there’s some stupid man talking about like buying tickets to Wicked or something else that I’m not interested in and highly annoyed by.
And all you need is $.99 for me to continue listening? How ridiculous. Don't spend it all in one place, Pandora.
And then Pandora tried to link to Facebook. Uh… NO THANK YOU! When I go in to see a new song is playing to find out the info so I can download it myself, the LAST thing I need to know is that Douchey McDoucherson “likes this artist”. What… a turnoff. Luckily I figured out how to disconnect from Facebook. Phew. Who knows what would have happened to my taste in music if I didn’t figure that one out.
And also, the alert that comes up saying that they don’t like playing to an empty room? That annoys me when I’m sitting there and it happens a bunch of times and I just want to be like YES. I’M RIGHT HERE. I AM IN THE ROOM. YOU ARE NOT PLAYING TO AN EMPTY ROOM. CALM DOWN. Or maybe it’s me who needs to calm down. Whatever.
If Pandora plays to an empty room, does it make a sound? They’re saying yes. I guess that solves the whole tree falling in the woods conundrum. Consider your mind blown.
Hm, what else can I gripe about? I guess I’ll just keep this short. My main point was that I had no idea that Pandora had any sort of limitations other than that you can’t push “next” more than 5 times in a row on the same station because of licensing restrictions. But I hope I’ve alerted you to this heinous injustice. And that together, we can make a change. Yes. We. Can.
P.S. As I wrote this… you can bet your ass I was listening to my newly created Phoenix station on Pandora the whole time. Whoopsies. Never said I wasn’t a hypocrite.